An author's whim
by Paranoidgirl
Summary: Bleylock is coupled with Harris again.... and decided to go against it. Warning: Slash, crack-pairings and HEAVY breaking of the fourth wall.


_It was dark in the small, hidden lab where Harris and Bleylock resided. Netherball had finished for tonight, yawning, Harris turned off the machinery._

"_By your leave, General." He said, getting up and preparing to go home and get some rest._

"_Not yet, Harris." Bleylock said, getting up from his sofa and approaching Harris, getting uncomfortably close, until their bodies were mere inches away from each other. "I need you for... something else." With that he loosened Harris' tie a bit, still leaning in very close._

"_G-general?" Harris whispered, feeling his breath pick up._

At that moment, Bleylock's eyes widened, as if he just realized something, as he stepped away from Harris.

"Alright, stop, stop, stop!" Bleylock said, getting up. Everything around him seemed to pause, except Harris. "What's the big idea? Why do you ALWAYS picture us as a couple?!" He shouted, most probably at the narrator. Harris took the time to straighten his tie. "I'm NOT gay!"

_Really? You tend to surround yourself with men an awful lot. In two seasons, spanning years, you only had less then a minute of time with a woman: and that was Dame Simbai, she's Aarch's girl._

This answer made Bleylock growl.

"But HARRIS?" Bleylock said, pointing at Harris, who made a little sad noise, clearly thinking otherwise about the whole ordeal. "I mean... the man is a queer, a coward, and a traitor to boot."  
"A trait...-Hey! No reading the script before the episode is aired! We had that deal after that whole 'Act surprised'-fiasco in the first season!" Harris said, looking extremely uncomfortable now.

"Harris, that was a comment about your betrayal to Tecnoid..." Bleylock asked, raising an eyebrow at Harris, who now had a clear 'Oh crap' expression on his face, before laughing nervously.

"That's what I meant...really." He quickly said.

_Anyway... if you're not into Harris, I can arrange another partner. How about... Baldwin?_

With that said, Harris dissipated from the scene with a 'plop', and Baldwin appeared with the same noise.

"Hey... I taught my contract was over." Baldwin said, confused, before seeing Bleylock. "Greetings, Sir, you're looking... healthy."

"Baldwin?!" Bleylock shouted, getting more furious by the minute. "That guy has even less personality then some of the Tecnodroids I use!"

_Fine, fine. How about... Clamp?_

Another 'plop', and Clamp now stood next to Bleylock instead of Baldwin.

"Okay, what the hell?... Oh crud..." Clamp said, seeing Bleylock.

"No!" Bleylock simply roared. "What even gave you that idea?!"

_Well, you were kind of possessive over him in the first season, not to mention you really liked to play with him._

"She got you there, Bleylock." Clamp commented. "You always had me close, for one reason or another." Another growl from Bleylock shut him up.

_Oh, I know! Duke Maddox!_

'Plop'

"Hey, weren't you..." Duke Maddox started, but Bleylock cut him off.

"Forget it! Fine! I concede, but PLEASE pair me up with a man who's decent-looking, smart, and at my level." He started.

_You sure?_

"Damn sure!"

_M'okay, your funeral. _

"It's about..." Bleylock said, before a plop noise interrupted him, and Sonny Blackbones, the bane of his existence was standing next to him.

"You..." The man in red furiously started, but Bleylock just about had enough.

"HARRIS!" He desperately shouted, as Sonny disappeared and Harris stood there once more.

"Great, now what? If this is about you telling me you don't need me anymore..." He was cut off as Bleylock pulled him in a fierce hug. "Oooo...kay..." He started.

_Good to see you've changed your mind._

"Just let me keep him..." Bleylock said, still a bit shell-shocked by the author's other choices. Harris just smiled a bit, rubbing the shocked man's back.

"There, there, this silly fanfiction author won't hurt you again..." He soothingly whispered. 'The actual script-writers will look to that.' He added in his mind, his smile turning devious.

_Now where were we..._

With that, Bleylock started undoing Harris' tie once more, getting ready for a pleasurable night... for all three of them.


End file.
